Henri Nouwen and His Ministry of Companioning with Wil Hernandez Part I
Introduction
Just as spirituality itself is irreducibly communal, so is our entire journey. Far from a picture of a solitary odyssey, we navigate through our spiritual life with the help of people coming alongside and companioning us. This series will spotlight Henri Nouwen’s ministry of soul companioning. Together we will take a closer look at how he journeyed with others. Hopefully, as a result, this can trigger a desire in us not only in terms of how we can be better companioned by others but more so, how we can be better companions for others on their journey.
Henri Nouwen was keenly aware of the danger of journeying without a trusted companion and called attention to the fact that “our way to God is always a human way, and that without a guide our spiritual journey can entangle us in introspective self-preoccupation instead of helping us to become empty for God.” Indeed all of us can profit from having spiritual companions who can tend to our souls. Elsewhere, he articulated this great need:
“We need someone who encourages us when we are tempted to give it all up, to forget it all, to just walk away in despair. We need someone who discourages us when we move too rashly in unclear directions or hurry proudly to a nebulous goal. We need someone who can suggest to us when to read and when to be silent, which words to reflect upon and what to do when silence creates much fear and little peace.”
Unwavering in his attention to the spiritual dimension of soul care, Nouwen acknowledged the need “for diagnosticians of the soul who can … guide people to an active and vital transformation of soul and body, and of all their personal relationships”—the kind who promote real change through repentance and faith, confronting and inspiring the people to whom they minister. He explained the dynamics involved: “Confrontation challenges us to confess and repent; inspiration stirs us to look up again with new courage and confidence.” Nouwen exercised both, with great care and delicate balance and he companioned people always with their spiritual well-being as his ultimate concern.
To be sure, we have a great deal to learn from Nouwen’s creative and elastic approach to spiritual accompaniment. In fact it is difficult if not impossible to peg down Henri Nouwen into one exclusive image or role—be it a pastor, a priest, or a prophet—for he assumed various roles as he ministered to the varying needs of people. Depending on the particular need or situation, Nouwen displayed enormous flexibility in his ministerial style and approach. Nouwen was definitely not one who was chained to any particular role. He was not what you would call a specialist. Rather, Nouwen functioned more as a generalist when it came to the ministry of formation, integrating with ease various aspects of companionship—whether as a friend, a guide, a mentor, or a spiritual director. It could be said that, instinctively, Henri Nouwen operated integratively in his overall ministry.
The contemporary world of Christian soul care covers an entire gamut of intersecting approaches to spiritual formation ministry. Soul care by itself alone cuts across the various categories of professional counseling, lay care giving, spiritual guidance and direction, and pastoral care and counseling, to mention some. In this series we will specifically focus on spiritual friendship, spiritual guidance, spiritual mentoring, and spiritual direction—four distinct but overlapping companioning approaches which Henri Nouwen no doubt employed in his ministry.
 Along with being an author and spiritual director, Wil works with the Leadership Institute in partnership with the Denver-based Spiritual Formation Alliance Network as coordinator of the Southern California Spiritual Formation Partners. He also teaches courses on the spirituality of Henri Nouwen at Fuller Theological Seminary, Haggard Graduate School of Theology at Azusa Pacific University, and the Center for Religion and Spirituality at Loyola Marymount University. You can find his two books, Henri Nouwen: A Spirituality of Imperfection and Henri Nouwen and Soul Care on Amazon. You can also visit the website he hosts called Nouwen Legacy. |
Wil,
I look forward to learning from Nouwen and yourself on how to better companion people in the journey of life. I like the fact that you are going to look at “companioning” from four different angles. I’m excited to see the uniqueness of each approach and how they overlap. I like Nouwen’s emphasis on how “companioning” mixes both inspiration and confrontation. Thanks for a great introduction to the series.
Will,
I look much forwards to this series to discover what ‘treasures of life’ Henri Nouwen had cherished on his journey and to learn from that.
Wil & JR,
I believe this will be a rich series and timely for a harried, hurried world of broken people. JR, I had no idea Nouwen did a couple 30 day silent retreats. That sounds like a fascinating spiritual discipline and I’m wondering if it’s possible today for the majority of Christ followers out there. I imagine for many of us one full day without words or interaction with others would be difficult.
Wil, I’m thankful you’ve done the hard work of bringing to light and connecting major themes of Nouwen’s life. I look forward to reading more.
Dustin,
I don’t believe my family life would fare well disappearing for a 30 day retreat; “Bye dear, take care of the kids for me!”.
I have however committed to a once-a-year, 5-7 day silent retreat at a Trappist Monastery. I must confess that my last Retreat was almost 2 years ago. I am greatly anticipating my next Retreat which will be coming up in exactly one month! For me there is nothing like quieting all the busyness and noise both external and internal.
Thanks for the invite JR to be a guest blogger on your “famous” site! Seriously it’ s my privilege and I trust Nouwen’s insights will bless many of your site’s followers!
Sonja and Dustin,
I appreciate your interest in the series. Read on!
Way to go Joe. Nouwen will rise and bless you
God will for sure honor your commitment to go for a 5-7 day silent retreat once a year. Just curious, which Trappist monastery do you go to?
Wil,
My last retreat was at the Abbey at Gethsemane in Kentucky – a 5 1/2 hour drive away.
This next retreat will be a little closer to home at Assumption Abbey in Ava Missouri.
I love the balance between words, and silence; between the chanting of the Liturgy of the Hours with the monks, and silently in my “cell” (room). Between the noise of the birds, and the breeze through the trees; and the silent whisperings of the Still Small Voice.
I can’t wait to get away with my Beloved!
Thanks Joe. That’s where Merton was before right? I would love to visit that place myself. I have some friends from Lee’s Summit who always go to Assumption Abbey. Heard that they have an awesome library! One of these days I will visit there, I’m pretty sure! Enjoy hanging out with God and wasting time with and for him!
Wil,
Yes, Merton was at Gethsemane.
Thanks for your words of encouragement!
Joe
Hi Wil! I’m looking forward to journeying with you as I endeavor to understand more about spiritual formation and this specific area of companionship. As a life-long evangelical whose idea of companionship merely consisted of one-on-one discipleship and/or mentoring, I enthusiastically welcome this discussion.
Great Curt! Read on, we’re on the 2nd installment already (HN on Sp Friendship and HN on Sp Guidance. Tomorrow, we’ll start with the 3rd in the series: HN on Sp Mentoring. Hope you can catch up with the series and join in on the conversation.
Hello Wil,
Thanks for letting me know about this conversation. It is exactly what I’m yearning for, and struggling with, right now. I read Richard Lamb’s excellent book Pursuing God in the Company of Friends last summer, plus the track at Hope with you earlier that year, and these ideas have been fermenting in me.
My wife and I supposedly are smallgroup leaders, but for various reasons there is still no “group” attached to our “small”. Having experienced deep smallgroup life and ministry in several contexts in the past, and feeling the need for peer mentoring & companionship right now, it brings up echoes of my “dark night of the soul”. Blah.
A question/observation: in your 5th paragraph you say “To be sure, we have a great deal to learn from Nouwen’s creative and elastic approach to spiritual accompaniment. In fact it is difficult if not impossible to peg down Henri Nouwen into one exclusive image or role—be it a pastor, a priest, or a prophet—for he assumed various roles as he ministered to the varying needs of people. Depending on the particular need or situation, Nouwen displayed enormous flexibility in his ministerial style and approach. Nouwen was definitely not one who was chained to any particular role. He was not what you would call a specialist. Rather, Nouwen functioned more as a generalist when it came to the ministry of formation, integrating with ease various aspects of companionship—whether as a friend, a guide, a mentor, or a spiritual director. It could be said that, instinctively, Henri Nouwen operated integratively in his overall ministry.”
Could it be that our habit of analyzing, categorizing, and carefully defining one concept/role/aspect from another actually hinders us from Nouwen-style instinctive integration of them all? I know that Nouwen also drew distinctions, sometimes fine ones, but he seemed to do it without also creating separations between them. I just found it a bit humorous that you define so rigorously those different aspects of companionship and roles of ministry, and then wonder at Nouwen’s ability to integrate them!
Having spoken at some length with you in person, I know that you also integrate those aspects of companionship (in fact, you did so at the time)– I just wonder if there is a different way of approaching and studying Nouwen, and other things, that is integrative at its core, integrative as a presupposition or a prolegomena or something… typology comes to mind, or a story-and-metaphor approach, rather than a study-and-dissect approach.
(and I’m fully aware that I write these words from an analytical perch myself!)
Hey Nic,
Good to hear from you after a long time. Thanks for your thoughtful comments. Actually if you read this piece from its broader context (you’re only reading an excerpt from my second book), I made it clear that all of these so-called accompaniment approaches are indeed distinct from each other in certain ways but at the same time overlapping in more ways than one. And Nouwen employed them with “elasticity” because he’s not one chained into one particular role or function. You have to understand that categorizations such as what I’ve done are mere attempts to distinguish one from the other in terms of applicational style but in the final analysis, classifications are, to a large extent, artificial in nature. Nouwen never self-consciously thought about his “roles” but just the same, the people whom he ministered unto labeled him according to how they have experienced him—whether as a friend, guide, mentor, director, etc. or a combination thereof. I hope that make sense. Thanks for interacting with the material well!